Antopia is a dating site for people with genital herpes (HSV1 and 2) and human papilloma virus (HPV, the virus that causes genital warts). FYI, about 20 percent of Americans have genital herpes (usually type 2) and about 75 percent of Americans of reproductive age have HPV.
At first glance, I thought this site seemed like a more modern version of a leper colony, and seemed to be marginalizing people. But after spending more time hanging around here, I've discovered that really it's just a regular dating site which has magically lifted the stigma surrounding these two relatively harmless STDs. For once, people with HSV and HPV don't have to deal with the stress of telling their prospective partners and risking their sudden disappearance.
Although it's a great idea for a site, I found the user interface kind of odd. Site emails are called “responses” (because you’re responding to an ad). Although they get forwarded straight to your personal email (and there's no site-based email inbox), you have to return to the site to answer them. When you browse profiles, you can see if the person in question is actually on the site at that moment. There are several chatrooms, including chit chat (casual talk), support, adult conversation (i.e. racy), over 40, and “Oz Chat,” which is for Australians (although several people I met in there were from the U.S.). Also on the site are bulletin boards, an instant messenger called “pssst!” which I haven’t been able to figure out, and of course information on HSV and HPV.
Small quibble with the profile settings: I’ve had a birthday since I last visited, but the site hadn't updated my age.
I first interviewed D.L., a 38-year-old hetero man from TX. He says, "I signed up originally to reach out to others with herpes, then grew to wanting to date, and now I come for the chat and friendliness."
D.S. is a 36-year-old hetero woman from NY. Of her experience here, she says, "It’s been wonderful, helpful, and supportive." She came looking for a partner and had a relationship that lasted two years. It recently ended, and she's back. She's not moping, though: she says "He doesn't deserve me." You go, girl. She doesn't use other dating sites because of the herpes issue.
She says, "This is a great place for self help, with many sincere, caring, authentic, people." Referring to a heckler in the chatroom, she adds, "And clowns, of course."
